Men Buy The Drinks Girls Call The Shots
by obsessedwithstabler
Summary: It's a woman's world, boys like it or not. Men buy the drinks, and girls call the shots!


Okay, I heard this song on my way to North Carolina, and it made me laugh so hard that I just had to write a story for it! The song is Men Buy The Drinks (Girls Call The Shots) by Steven Holy, and it is absolutely adorable! So enjoy, and please remember to review!

Disclaimer: They ain't mine.

This songfic is dedicated to Rach, Sweet-4-Stabler, Kinseyjo, JusticeIsBlind13, and to everyone else who reads my stories! Thanks a lot!

Elliot watched as Olivia and Alex laughed and joked, and he leaned back in his chair and rested his hands behind his head.

"What do you suppose they're talking about?" Munch inquired, peering over the top of his sunglasses. Fin shrugged, and Elliot laughed.

"Probably us," Elliot answered, propping his feet up on his desk. Munch and Fin both glared at Elliot, and he half shrugged and said, "You know I'm right."

Olivia saw the guys watching them out of the corner of her eye, but she ignored them and leaned in closer to Alex.

"So, was it good?" she whispered conspiringly, and Alex grinned.

"Better than I thought. He's a very… gifted man," the blond stated with a barely contained smirk. "And those hands."

Olivia giggled loudly, and Alex joined in quickly, earning both of them curious glances from their male colleagues.

Once the laughing fit had passed, Alex grabbed Olivia's arm and whispered, "What about Elliot? He's definitely got to be something else, right?"

Olivia blushed furiously, and Alex nudged her in the ribs. "Well, let's just say that he's definitely no slacker in the bedroom, or in any room, for that matter."

The women continued to laugh hysterically, and John and Fin exchanged confused looks, while Elliot closed his eyes and shook his head.

Eve said to Adam

"Honey, how about a bite?"

He said, "Baby, it sounds tempting

But you know it ain't right"

But Eve was wearing

One of those low cut leaves

So they shook that apple

Right off of that tree

"Elliot, are you ready yet?" Olivia demanded as she slid her earrings into her ears. He shouted from the bedroom, and she sighed and went back in.

He was standing bare chested in the middle of the room, a shirt in each hand and a hopeless look on his face. When he saw her in the red, knee length dress, his jaw dropped, and she smirked at him and took the blue shirt from his right hand.

"Put this one on, El. It brings out your eyes," she stated, laying the shirt on the bed. He put the other one away, and as his back turned to her, Olivia's cheeks suddenly heated, and she reached out and pulled him into her arms.

"Olivia, wha-"

She silenced him with a hard kiss, shoving him against the wall as her soft hands roamed over his chest. Immediately his mind kicked into overdrive, and he grabbed her by the waist and gently pushed her down onto the bed.

"What… about… dinner?" he moaned, rolling his pants off of his hips.

She giggled and grabbed his biceps, flipping him over onto his back and straddling his waist, her knees resting on either side of his waist.

"Screw dinner," she hissed as his hand reached up between her legs and began stroking her.

"I'd rather screw you," he purred, smirking as her hips bucked against his hand.

Downstairs, Kelly Michaels and her husband Logan were watching T.V. when they heard bedsprings, and Logan moaned.

"Those two are at it again," he groaned as the occupants of the apartment above theirs begin to moan loudly. Kelly smiled and snuggled into her husband's side.

"I think it's sweet," she stated, and he sighed and mumbled something under his breath.

She rose to her feet and took a step towards the bedroom. "Logan, why don't we have a little fun of our own?" she suggested, leaning against the door frame.

He looked at the T.V., then at his wife. Then he jumped from his seat on the couch, and she giggled as he chased her into the bedroom.

Ever since then, it's been

The battle of the sexes

In a game called love

It's y's versus x's

Sometimes they let us win, boys

So we feel like we beat them

But admit it fellas

They could go undefeated

Cause it's a woman's world

Might as well face it

Yeah, they got what we want

And we're willing to chase it

It's a woman's world, boys like it or not

Men buy the drinks, girls call the shots

"John, we have to get to the restaurant in an hour," Alex sighed as Munch stepped into the shower behind her.

"Mm hmm," he mumbled as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back into his chest.

She turned in his arms and pressed her lips against his, laughing when he lifted her up and pressed her against the wall of the shower.

EOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEO

Fin sighed and stared at his watch. They were two hours late, and he finally stood up and stretched, deciding that they weren't going to show up.

As he walked through the crowded bar, a brown eyed woman caught his eye, and for a second, he stared at her dumbly.

She noticed that he was watching her, and she smiled at him and gave him a little wave. He waved back, then sat back down at the bar.

A few minutes later, she sat down beside him, and he put on his most charming smile and said, "Can I buy you a drink?"

She smiled back at him and said, "Sure. Margarita."

After several drinks, the woman, who revealed herself as Sam, took Fin by the hand and dangled a set of keys in front of his face. Fin grinned and slapped a fifty down on the bar to cover the drinks, then followed Sam out of the bar.

Us boys think we're smarter

I know that's a shocker

But once they starting looking like

The combination to the locker

All they gotta do is flash

A schoolgirl look

Next thing you know

We're carrying their books

"I don't believe it," Fin stated, crossing his arms over his broad chest.

Elliot laughed and leaned back in his chair, saying, "Yeah, it's true, whether you want to believe it or not. But you know it's true."

Fin shook his head again.

"Fine, alright. But who paid for the drinks?"

"I did. I'm no jerk," Fin said, puffing his chest out.

"And let me guess. Afterwards, you went back to her place, right?"

"Yeah. So?"

"I rest my case," Elliot stated, resting his hands behind his head.

"Why are you so confident that you know everything about women?" Munch asked as he took his own chair, and Elliot smirked.

"Easy. They got what we want, and we're willing to chase them to get it," he stated, and Fin and Munch exchanged glances. "And they know that we can't live without them. That's their ace in the hole."

"Elliot Stabler!"

Elliot nearly fell out of his chair at the sound of his name being screamed by a familiar voice, and Fin and Munch both laughed hysterically.

A fuming Olivia appeared in his line of sight, and he put on his most charming smile as he said, "Liv, baby. What's wrong?"

She didn't answer him. Instead, she grabbed him by the ear and dragged him out of the squadroom, with Munch and Fin's laughter ringing in his ears.

Once they get a little older

It's just more the same

Just costs a little extra if you wanna

Stay in the game

But don't think for one minute, boys

That we're in control

They know we can't live without them

That's their ace in the hole

Cause it's a woman's world

Might as well face it

They got what we want

And we're willing to chase it

It's a woman's world, boys like it or not

Men buy the drinks, girls call the shots

A half hour later, Elliot appeared from the cribs, and Munch and Fin stared at him expectantly as he sat down in his chair.

"So? Did you get flogged?" Munch asked, and Elliot shook his head.

"Well, then what is it?" demanded Fin, and a grin lit up Elliot's features.

"She's pregnant," he finally answered, and Munch's jaw dropped while Fin scraped himself off of the ceiling.

EOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEOJAEO

"So, now do you two believe me?" Elliot questioned, and the other men glared at him.

"Believe you about what?" asked Munch, and Elliot sighed.

"Women. It's a woman's world."

Fin shook his head. "I still don't believe it."

Elliot chuckled and leaned back in the wooden chair. "Well, the sooner you two figure that out, the better. You won't be in so much trouble."

"I'm never in trouble," Munch exclaimed, and from behind him, a pair of arms slipped around his neck and pretended to choke him.

"I know you didn't just say what I think you said, right sweetheart?" Alex purred into his ear, and he gulped and shook his head. She patted his head and kissed his cheek, saying, "Good."

She walked away, and as soon as she was out of earshot, Elliot and Fin burst into laughter.

"Yeah, it's a woman's world alright," Elliot stated through his laughter, and Munch glared at the two of them. "We buy the drinks, but they call the shots."_Yeah, it's a woman's world_

_Might as well face it_

_Yeah, they got what we want_

_And we're willing to chase it_

_It's a woman's world, boys like it or not_

_Men buy the drinks, girls call the shots_

_Yeah it's a woman's world_

_Ooh, it's a woman's world_

_Yeah it's a woman's world_

_Men buy the drinks, girls call the shots_

_Yeah, it's a woman's world_

_Ooh, it's a woman's world_

_Yeah, it's a woman's world_

_Men buy the drinks, girls call the shots_

The End

A/N: Okay, there ya have it! Now, I got a question for ya'll. Next up, would ya'll rather see smut, angst, or comedy, and what ship would ya'll prefer? Just review and let me know!!


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